Be blunt how is it?

Timeless





When my sadness turns to anger


and bitter sweet is father time


we're siftin' through life's little moments


planting seedless thoughts


harvesting residential crimes





When we climb up on this tree


that's fallen many years before


we lose future oppertunities


send me there 25 6 to 4





once lost and lonely


I now just seem lost


let's ride this cloud on by


winter's hell embedded frost





8 hours are now left


to push all my thought through


a mind trips restless white water


cutting through a forest of azure.


Joshua Edward Bryan





Copyright ©2007 Joshua Edward Bryan

Be blunt how is it?
Assuming that this is a poem or somesuch, and assuming that you're trying to get some kind of personal philosophy across and sound as a great philosopher, I think it sucks. Poetry is supposedly "a thing of beauty", and, as we all know, "beauty is in the eye of the beholder", and, to me, "philosophical poetry" sucks. And philosophy is entirely different from day dreaming and fantasizing. Please put a lot more thought in your "poetry" style, and spend more time living life before you try your hand at being a "great thinker". God Bless you.
Reply:Please forgive my harshness. I "demand" a lot out of myself, and when someone, such as yourself, asks me to be "blunt", well . . .. God Bless you. Report It

Reply:ummm.....I think its good...
Reply:Hi Josh





I thought it was great!! You are obviously a thinker. email me if you would like a horoscope.